Emotions of Lupus

Strength of My Lupus Spirit

The excruciating body pain today along with the debilitating fear of the unknown could possibly have taken over me today. Despite it all, the strength of my spiritual connection fortified by time in my garden and a beautiful sunset enabled me to release from the effects of Lupus. I’m so grateful…. **



One word to describe my Lupus body today:  Painful

Which habits and rituals did I practice to soothe my Lupus body?

  • Ate a clean diet
  • Breathed fresh air

More details about my physical symptoms:
Today, I had my weekly physical therapy appointment and just the slightest touch from her was excruciating. My pain ran the gamut today—tight muscle pain, sporadic nerve pain, and awful arthritic pain in my back, hips, legs. I still have a few itchy hives, but they are subsiding, thankfully. It seems that when I get rid of one issue, another one pops up. Before today, it was the hives, but today, the pain decided to remind me of how bad it can be, too.



One word to describe my Lupus mind today: Scared

Which habits and rituals did I practice to strengthen my Lupus mind?

  • Focused on the Positive
  • Protected Alone Time
  • Connected with My Doctor

More details and thoughts about how I’m feeling emotionally today:
I had my first appointment with my new neurologist today. The one I met and established with in March of this year (see this post from March 24, 2015) suddenly left the practice. So, I had to find someone else to evaluate how the Lupus may be affecting my brain. My symptoms include lots of dizziness, strange, vice-like headaches, and fogginess. Anyway, he showed me the MRI of my brain that was taken back in April, and there are a few “white matter” areas, he said. They could be vascular changes, which he decided needed further evaluation—a cerebral vascular event test and more blood work. After leaving his office, when I got into my car. I cried. It’s a lot to bear sometimes.



One word to describe my spirit today: Reflective

Which habits and rituals did I practice to nurture my Lupus spirit?

  • Enjoyed sacred space
  • Meditated, prayed, visualized

Thoughts about my spiritual connection and spiritual lessons learned today:
I’m sitting out in my backyard among the colorful roses, Russian sage, salvia, and black pines, feeling the warm glow of the evening sun. It’s approaching the horizon line and just about to set. This is my favorite time of day during the summer. I like to sit here an reflect on my day and just be quiet. At today’s appointment with the new neurologist, I was discussing my case with him and going over all my records and test results over the past seven or eight years. And, I was struck by how much I’ve been through. When you look at the big picture of it, it’s definitely worthy of reflection. As I reflect, I try to keep my spirits of  by seeing–WOW–I’m still here and living life. He commented on my smile an said it was good to see a patient with such a positive attitude and warm spirit.



Today my meals were:

  • Breakfast: Gluten free waffles
  • Lunch: Sushi and miso soup
  • Dinner: Sliced turkey and bacon sandwich on gluten-free bread
  • Snacks: None



At least one thing that I’m grateful for today:

  • My Hubby
  • A beautiful sunset

**(This post is based on the format of the Lupus Diary that I developed for keeping track of how Lupus affects my body, mind, and spirit, I check-in here once a week to let you know about the more interesting days of my Lupus journey. To learn more about the Lupus Diary, how I developed it, and why I use it, click here.)

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